Quick Ways To Reduce Stress and Anxiety: Counseling And Therapy Skill #1- Breathing
Now, I know what you might be thinking, I have heard many say it, “breathing doesn’t work” or “breathing doesn’t make me feel calm.” But most of the time when I have investigated in therapy with someone, it turns out they are breathing the same way they do to get oxygen, and breathing to relax is done differently.
There is also another reason breathing does not work for some and it is that deep breathing can trigger panic for some people. For those that panic, other strategies are likely to be more helpful for you.
For the rest of us, breathing can be very helpful, but to get the best benefit it needs to be done a certain way. Breathing this way resets the nervous system which is very helpful in calming ourselves when we are upset and lets us feel more able to problem solve solutions to the issue that is upsetting us.
So How Do I Breathe To Relax?
Step 1: Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.
Step 2: Place one hand over your heart and one hand on your belly- the goal is to get the hand on your belly to rise. “Belly breathing” is more relaxing than “chest breathing.” This is also how singers can sing such big notes. They often call it “diaphragm breathing.”
Step 3: You want to breathe in and out to the count of five. This is not a quick 5 count, think more like one, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand etc. For example, breathe in, 1 . . . 2 . . . 3 . . . 4 . . . 5, breathe out, 1 . . . 2 . . . 3 . . . 4 . . . 5.
There is also an app called Inner Balance by HeartMath that helps to work on this as it teaches you to breathe at the right pace, but you will need to purchase the Bluetooth ear piece to use the free app. It also teaches you to do an enhanced breathing technique called heart breathing which is imagining breathing through the heart while imagining a positive image or memory. The app coaches you on how to do this. The ear piece tracks your heart beat and this program has the added benefit of helping to train your heart beat and breathe to get in sync together which they call coherence. This is important because when they are in sync, it calms the body and a message is sent to the brain to be calm. If you would like to find out more about HeartMath, click here.
Step 4: Practice breathing when calm before trying it when upset. You will need to get good at “belly breathing” as this does not come natural and you will find yourself doing “chest breathing” if your don’t practice first. I suggest practicing doing 10 breathes this way when calm a few times a week. Be patient with yourself if it is hard at first to retrain your brain to a different way of breathing.
Breathing Variations:
Breathing variations are done by how you exhale. Here are some popular ones.
Lion’s Breath: As you exhale, you will stick out your tongue as far as it will go and then you will exhale while making the sound of a roaring lion. Don’t be shy! Let your inner lion roar and watch as negative thoughts and feelings run away from your roar! Children in particular tend to like this one.
Sigh Exhale: As you exhale, you will let out a big sigh which increases the feeling of relaxation.
Fish Lips Exhale: As you exhale, you will purse your lips kind of like fish lips and blow the air out as your exhale. As you do this, imagine blowing all your worries away.
I hope this helps you try out a new strategy to help with your anxiety and to decide if your are interested in further pursuing counseling, therapy, or psychotherapy in Crescent City. If you are still unsure or are feeling stuck in finding a therapist that is a good fit for you, feel free to call me at (707) 954- 7060 for a free 15 minute consultation. I’d be happy to hear about what is happening and help direct you to the right person. If you are looking for help with anxiety counseling, depression counseling, or trauma counseling, you can read more about how I can help here.